Its not stress that kills us, it is our reaction to it.

At work we’re in the middle of a huge softwareconversion.  This project is allconsuming and mentally draining.  Thereis so much prep work that needs to be done prior to the go-live date it’soverwhelming.  So, needless to say I’mstressed out all the time.  I try not tobring my anxiety home . . . at least not to take it out on my family.  I hope I’m being successful.  

But, my work follows me into my dreams.  I’ve been dreaming about the project almostevery night . . . and it’s exhausting.  I’mnot getting any real rest because that’s all I’m thinking about.  To make matters worse, the other night I notonly dreamt about my regular job, I also somehow managed to work in mypart-time bartending job, as well.  Aaargghh! 

Last night I caught a break . . . I didn’t dream about workat all. 

I dreamt I was riding a bicycle.  It was too tall for me and my feet didn’ttouch the ground.  I’m peddling along andI realize that the brakes on the bike don’t work.  It doesn't seem to bother me and I keeppeddling along at a steady rate of speed. I’m approaching the top of along winding downhill stretch. Then a guy comes up along side of me and asks if he can get a lift.  I tell him okay.  But instead of hopping on the back of thebike . . . where he was going to sit, I don’t know . . . he starts runningalongside the bike and pushing it to make it go faster.  I’m like, “Whoah buddy!  I don’t have any brakes!.”    Hechecks it out and discovered the brake cables are all loose.

That’s all I remember . . . what in the hell is thatsupposed to mean??

Interpretation of the dream from only dream dictionaries is as follows:

To dream that you are riding a bicycle means that you arefeeling confused and unsteady.   Ridingit down hill, if the rider be a woman, calls for care regarding her good nameand health; misfortune hovers near.

To dream that your brakes failed suggests that your life isunorganized and you need to take more control of issues and situations.

You should achieve harmony between all aspects of your lifeif you want to reach your goals. If you have difficulties riding the bicycle,then it implies that you doubt your ability to achieve success withoutassistance.

Well, there it is.  I can actually go along with that one!

Here's mud in your eye!

There once was a man . . . a man blind from birth . . . who spenthis days sitting alongside the road to Jerusalem.  He had done nothing to cause his infirmary buthe was sightless, even so. 

One day he heard the approach of many feet.  Based on the party’s conversation he soon deducedthat the group was a rabbi with his followers trailing behind.  He was surprised to hear that they werespeaking of him to their leader.

The banter halted and the blind man was taken aback by the abrupthawking and spitting into the dirt by the rabbi, who was closest to him.  He was further confused by scraping sounds inthe dust near where he sat.  Without warning, seemingly out of nowhere, a thumb pressed hard againsthis unblinking eyeball coating with a moist earthy smelling paste.  He attempted to fend off the attacker when, again,a thumb pressed hard against his other eyeball, covering that one with muck, aswell. 

He felt his eyes, to feel what was there. "It's mud," the man exclaimed. "You've put mud in my eyes!"

Thegentle voice of the rabbi instructed him to go and wash it out in a nearbypool.

Understandingcame to the sightless man.  He had heardtell of healers using mud as a poultice to restore to health to the infirmed.

Hemade his way to the pool and as the mud washed away so did his blindness. 

The blind man who now could see became a follower of the rabbi . . . whose name just so happened to beJesus.

TheGospel according to John – Chapter 9

Theorigin of the toast . . . Here’s mud in your eye.    I kid you not!                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                         

When I see a bird that walks like a duck and swims like a duck and quacks like a duck, I call that bird a duck.

I think I missed something. At what point did having duck lips become sexy?  I’m not talking naturally full, plump lips .. . like Angelina Jolie. 

I’m talking people who inject crap . . . and I mean crap . .. into their lips.  From fat transfersfrom one point on the patient’s body to make their lips fat, to donor tissueextracted from cadavers . . . that’s dead people folks . . .  to collagen.  Collagen sounds like the least offensive butdid you know that collagen is extracted from cow hides . . . that would be deadcows folks.  Just sayin’.

And I don't think I'm exaggerating when I'm comparing these lip jobs to duck bills . . . 

Go ahead . . . tell me I'm wrong!

Anyhoo . . . is this sexy?

Or this?  

Seriously, is this sexy??  Just askin'.

(And, yes, that's a dude.)

Toast will always land butter side down

Murphy’s Law . . . you know the one that goes ‘If anythingcan go wrong, it will’ . . . so named after Capt. Edward A. Murphy, a US AirForce Engineer.    While working on oneof Murphy’s assigned projects, a technician flubbed the wiring.  The good captain cursed the man and said,"If there is any way to do it wrong, he'll find it."   Shortly afterwards, aerospace manufacturers beganusing it during their ad campaigns and Murphy's Law was born.

Murphy’s Law . . . such that is . . . is an adage that hasbeen around for hundreds of year.  Longbefore Murphy’s grandfather’s grandfather was a sperm waiting to meet anegg.  Good thing the law didn’t apply tohim or Murphy may never have been around to make the phrase famous.

Anyhoo  . . . before itwas Murphy’s Law, it was more commonly known as Sod’s Law; especially acrossthe pond.  When someone is unlucky theyare often referred to as an unlucky sod . . . hence Sod’s Law.

Of course, things have been going wrong since the beginningof time.  I’m sure there was a precursor toSod’s Law.

In modern times, there are Finagle’s Law, Hanlon’s Razor, andHofstadter's law; which all pretty much add up to the same thing . . . similar ideas,different viewpoints.  But I think myfavorite may be Sturgeon’s Law.  Socalled after Sci-fi writer Theodore Sturgeon who stated "ninety percent ofeverything is crap" . . . yeah, that pretty much sums it up.

In olden days a glimpse of stocking was looked on as something shocking but now, God knows, anything goes.

Hubby and I go out to our favorite bar once a week for date night.  It typically consists of hot wings and cold beer and conversation.  We talk about everyday mundane things like ‘how was your day’ to ‘remember when Joe Namath wore pantyhose’.

Do you remember when Broadway Joe, former quarterback for the NY Jets and later for the LA Rams, did a commercial wearing pantyhose?  With a cymbal roll, the camera slowly pans up hosieried legs, then crosses green satin shorts and the No. 12 football jersey, revealing famous New York Jets team quarterback (1965-1972) Joe Namath.

Joe didn’t actually wear pantyhose . . . "Now I don't wear pantyhose, but if Beautymist can make MY legs looks good, imagine what they'll do for yours."  . . . but apparently he was secure enough in his masculinity to do a national advertising campaign wearing them.  Of course, they threw in a hot chick smooching him at the end of the commercial so that his sexuality wouldn’t be in question.

Okay, that’s all fine and dandy.  But while digging up the little bits of JoeNamath hosiery trivia I came across something I didn’t expect.  Apparently, men do wear pantyhose . . . except that they’re called mantyhose.  They even come with a fly opening in thefront.  I’m kind of freaking out.

 

There is actually a company that sells support legwear madeexclusively for men.  They’ve been aroundsince 1999.  It’s not supposed to be aproduct aimed at cross-dressers but the target is the active male . . . . addingwarmth-without-bulk for outdoor runners and bicyclists,  a great base layer for hunters, campers andskiers in cold climates.

Still a little creeped out here . . .

Aside from the noted medical benefits to wearing supportivehosiery they’re made with the man’s fashion sense in mind.  Most men wear them under long pants . . . forsupport or warmth or whatever . . . andovertly flaunting the fact that they’re wearing tights.  

Some men go so far as to wear them withshorts and they have like designs and stuff on them . . . like fancy girliehose but with manly-ish take.  Really? Uhm . . . sure.

It makes sense they they’re considered viable solution forcomplaints by men of aching, tired legs, varicose veins, or other circulationissues. But I’m still a little weirded out about the idea of my hubby wearingstockings.   

I'm trying to keep an open mind but it keeps snapping shut.  Sorry . . . 

 Beef And Tequila Stew


2 Lb Sirloin, Cubed
1/4 C  Butter
1/2 C  Onion; Chopped, 1 Medium
4 Slices Bacon; Cut Up
2 Jalepeno Peppers, Sliced
1 C Baby Carrots
2 Stalks Celery; Chopped
1/4 C  Tequila
3/4 C  Tomato Juice
2 T  Cilantro; Fresh, Snipped
1 1/2 T  Salt
1 Can Garbanzo Beans;
4 C  Tomatoes; Chopped, 4 Medium
2 Cloves Garlic;Finely Chopped




Melt butter in a heavy pot.  Add beef.  Cook and  stir beef over medium heat until brown.  


Remove beef with slotted spoon and drain.  Cook and stir onion, peppers and bacon in same skillet until bacon is crisp.  Stir in beef and remaining ingredients.  Heat to boiling; reduce heat.  Cover and simmer until beef is tender, about 1 hour.


To thicken stew, mix two tablespoons of corn starch in 1/2 cup cold water.  Bring stew to boiling and stir in cornstarch slurry.


I topped my stew with dumplings made with Jiffy Baking Mix:


To make dumplings, mix with a fork:


2 c. baking mix (Bisquick or Jiffy type mix)
3/4 c. milk


Drop by spoonfuls onto boiling stew. Reduce to simmer, cover and continue cooking 20 minutes more. Makes 10 to 12 dumplings.  

In olden days a glimpse of stocking was looked on as something shocking but now, God knows, anything goes.

Cole Porter

Awareness without action is worthless

One of my weekendpleasures is watching old movies . . . old like from the 40’s, 50’s and 60’s.  I like to plop myself down on the couch witha ball of yarn and a crochet hook or knitting needles, watch the classics andjust chill.

I don’t know if thosemovies depict how people really interacted or spoke but it’s good cleanfun.  Sometimes the dialogue includes aword that gets stuck in my head, a word that isn’t used in modern everydayconversation.  It dig, dig, digs.  Eventually, I make the effort to check itout. 

One word that comesto mind is ‘picayune’.  I heard it in themovie Mr. Skeffington from 1944 starring Bette Davis and Claude Rains.  Bette was nominated for an Oscar for herperformance.  But that’s neither here nor there . . . thepoint is that that silly word is now stuck in my brain and I’m here to purgeit.

This is what Ifound out about picayune . . .

Used up until themid-1800’s, a picayune was a small Spanish coin, worth half a real . . . aboutsix cents.  Interestingly, the word isactually derived from a French word meaning ‘small coin’.

Eventually, a ‘picayune’came to mean something that is piddling or worthless.

So there you haveit.

She’s sick as a cushion, she wants nothing but stuffing

It’s all a matter of perception and personal physicalendurance . . . typically the difference is as basic as girl vs. boy . . . I’mtalking about not feeling well.  Where a womanwill be feeling a little peaked and under the weather, a man will be non-functionaland sick as a dog.

‘Sick as a dog’ . . . an interesting phrase.  I don’t think I’ve ever heard anyone say “I’mas sick as a goldfish”.  Of course, I’venever seen a sick goldfish before . . . they’re usually either alive or dead .. . I guess if someone was as sick as a goldfish they’d be in a dire conditionindeed!

Anyhoo . . . the phrase originates across the pond in merryol’ Englandwhere being sick isn’t merely having a sniffle or the flu.  Being sick in Britain usually means barfing.

What animals have you ever seen puking?  Cats and dogs mostly.  Horses can’t vomit, by the way . . . and cowsjust do it in their mouth and keep on chewing.   

Cats usually just spew up furballs so that’s not reallybeing sick . . . it’s just regurgitating their own fluff.  Now when dogs retch it’s usually because they’vebeen into something they shouldn’t have been . . . cat biscuits from thelitterbox and putrefying road kill come immediately to mind.  And when dogs blow chunks it’s usually quitedramatic.

To fully appreciate the original sense of "sick as adog," picture this . . . while basking in the after glow of a lovely mealand enjoying a delightful glass of wine in front of a romantic fire with abeautiful woman (or man or whatever you prefer) when Max lurches into the roomafter consuming a banquet from the neighbor’s garbage can and displays hisgastronomical discomfort all over the floor at your feet.  Aaah . . . what a lovely portrait I paint. 

So, if you’re sick as a dog it’s supposed to mean that you’reill enough to be up-chucking a lung . . . at least if you’re a girl.