Firewater Friday - People think you can't be clever if you have breasts

There once was a man from Nantucket. . . no really . . . there was.  Butthat has nothing to do with this blog post.

What it IS aboutis two whacked out chicks with impressive chumbawumbas.  Not extraordinary merely for their robust(get it . . . bust) size but for whattheir gazongas have done for them. 

This is about good jahoobies versus evil knockers.

A Floridawoman was recently busted for drivingwhile intoxicated.  But . . . accordingto her . . .  it wasn’t her alcoholconsumption that caused her to recklessly operate her motor vehicle.  Oh no . . . it was her num-nums!

When the police officer informed her that he wanted toperform a field sobriety test she asserted that it would not be possible forher to pass such an examination stating that her “big boobies” 

cause her to beoff balance. 

In the official report to police officer wrote, “When I toldher we were going to do some roadside tasks she told me that I needed tounderstand that she is big chested and if I asked her to close her eyes andbalance she is not going to balance well," he went on to write "WhenI told her she had to keep her hands at her side she stated hell no not withthese. Telling me again she can't do it, not with her big boobies.”

The fact that she reeked of booze, was staggering around andcouldn’t talk straight was reason enough to book her.  That and the glass of “tea” the deputy foundin her car that smelled suspiciously like hootch.

She offered to show the policeman her ta-ta’s.  He declined.

In other news, a different woman driver claims her 38KKK hooterssaved her from death when she wrecked her car. 

The proud bearer of the world’s largest breast implantsclaims that her ginormous milkmakers spared her from an early demise by actingas secondary airbags when she lost control of her car and rammed into a tree.

She was cited for operating a motor vehicle while intoxicatedand for not wearing a seat belt.   Sheclaims that she does not drink alcohol; however, she admitted to taking drugsfor various ailments including backaches . . . you think those back pains mayhave something to do with the fact that her cha-chas are the size ofbasketballs?

Hmmm  . . .

Slow Comfortable Screw  

 1 Oz. Vodka

 1 Oz.Southern Comfort

 1 Oz. SloeGin

 5 Oz. OrangeJuice

Add all ingredients to a cocktail shaker half-packed with ice. Shake, shake, shake . . . Pour into a glass filled with ice.

People think you can't be clever if you have breasts.
Kelly Brook