Why I Like Velveeta

Velveeta . . . you know the stuff.  It can barely be called cheese . . . and it’snot really, not even to the USFDA.  It’s considered a processed cheese food product.   I like the fact that they had to include the word 'food' in the classification.  Like there was a question about whether or not it's food . . . well, maybe there is. 

I’ll admit that I like it. Like spam . . . it has its place in my kitchen but by no means would I putit up there with my beloved super sharp cheddar or luscious creamy brie. 

I've noticed that, depending on where I shop, I may find itin the refrigerated dairy section or I may find it on a shelf somewhere else inthe store.  The question is . . . does itneed to be refrigerated?  Well, no . . . not really.  

It is shelf stable because it is so very,very ultra-super-duper highly pasteurized and it’s not truly cheese and it is vacuum sealed itactually does not need to be kept cold.  Somewould argue that you don’t even need to refrigerate it after it’s been opened .. . well, I err on the side of caution and not go that far. 

Velveeta has a longevity that rivals uranium but to keep itfresh it’s best stored in an airtight container after you’ve opened it.  Refrigerate or not . . . I’ll leave that upto you. 

For those of you cringing over the thought of consumingVelveeta . . . remember when the power went out for weeks and weeks in parts ofthe country after Hurricane Rita and the subsequent snow storm?  Well, because Velveeta has such a long shelflife it is excellent to keep on hand to go with your long or short termsurvival supplies.  It’s great forcamping, too.

Just remember that as well as Velveeta keeps it does lose some quality over time . . .yes, I know, quality is a relativeterm.  Whatever  . . . just make sure you mark the date ofyour stored Velveeta.

If you’re a fisherman . . . keep a plastic container ofVelveeta in your fishing tackle box.  Believe it or not, trout like the stuff . . . whethera week old or a year old, they don’t care.  

And if you want to give those fishies an extra special treat, stuff a pieceof garlic into the inside of the cheese ball . . . you’ll have cheesy garlicstuffed trout on your table in no time . . . well, processed cheese food product and garlic stuffed trout, anyway.

Enjoy!

Cheesy Chicken Spaghetti

2 Cups Cooked andShredded Chicken

4 Cups (8 oz. Dry)Cooked Spaghetti

8 Oz. Velveeta {OrMore}, Melted

1 Can Cream OfChicken Soup

1 Can GreenChilies {Or A Can Of Tomatoes With Green Chilies}

1/2 Tsp. GarlicPowder

Mix altogether andpour into a greased 9x13 pan. Sprinkle the top with some shredded cheddarcheese. Bake at 350 for 30 min. or until bubbly.

It's no cakewalk . . .

Cakewalk . . . a word that has come to mean something thatis easy to do.   As in . . . getting myhubby to try a new beer is a cakewalk . . . see NBT.

A cakewalk originated as a dance performed by African Americansduring and after the US Civil War when blacks were segregated from polite whitesociety.  People of color were notinvited to public events like parties and balls . . . but as servants they wereoften in attendance.  Not for the fun ofcourse . . . they had the “pleasure” of watching white folks twist, twirl and strutdoing the popular dances of those days.

The cakewalk became not only a popular dance but a form ofentertainment among the black people of that era.  It started as a form of satire to mimic the movesthat whites displayed during their Minuets and Waltzes. 

It eventually became a competition between couples to seewho could cakewalk the most gracefully or extravagantly.  Perhaps as a further extension of the joke, thispromenade was often done in a circle with a cake in the middle.   Whichever couple had the most style or flamboyancein their struts got to take home the cake.

And that’s how the phrase “take the cake” originated andcame to mean to take the prize.

The funny thing is that the cakewalk was further popularized by the white performers of Vaudeville in the next century.  So . . . the cakewalk was a dance done by black people to mock the white people who did it to make fun of the black people . . . in essence they were only goofing on themselves.  

Pepperoni String Cheese Roll Ups

1 (8 Ounce) Package Refrigerated Crescent Roll Dough

4 Cheese Sticks,Halved

1 (3.5 Ounce)Package Sliced Pepperoni

Garlic ButterGlaze:

2 TablespoonsButter, Melted

1/2 TeaspoonItalian Seasonings

1/4 TeaspoonGarlic Powder

1 TablespoonGrated Parmesan Cheese

Preheat oven to350 degrees.

Take each triangleof crescent roll dough and place about 6 pepperoni on the bottom of thetriangle. Place half of a cheese stick on top and roll up. Place seam side downon a cookie sheet and bake for 10-14 minutes or until golden brown.

While rolls arecooking, combine the melted butter, Italian seasonings, garlic powder andParmesan cheese in a small bowl.

When rolls aredone remove from the oven and brush with the garlic butter glaze. Serve withmarinara or ranch for dipping.

I like breaking the rules

A cardinal rule . . . what kind of rule?  An angry bird rule?  God forbid you disobey an angry bird!!

Seriously, though, I always thought the term ‘cardinal rule’ referred to some sort of religious tenet that morphed into an everyday saying about an all important directive that must be obeyed.

Well . . . suffice to say, I was wrong.  Shocking, I know.  But, it happens now and again.

The word ‘cardinal’ comes from the root word 
‘cardo’, which in Latin translates to ‘hinge’ or ‘that on which something turns or depends’.  Therefore, something cardinal is important because all else hinges upon it.  It is a fundamental rule . . . something that is essential that cannot be deterred from.

A cardinal rule could be: Isn't it the first cardinal rule of perm maintenance that you are forbidden to wet your hair for at least 24 hours after getting a perm at the risk of deactivating the ammonium thioglycolate? 

Back to the church . . . before it was all powerful and had such a grand hierarchy and far reaching authority on everything and everyone . . . a cardinal was simply a clergyman being that he was attached to the church . . . much like a door is attached by a hinge to  a building.  

And back to that angry bird . . . why is it red?  Well, because somehow the name cardinal went from being a simple man to a prince (of the church) and was clad all in red . . . the bird was thusly name because it was all red much likes the robes of churchly princes.

No, he was not red because he was angry; you people and your imaginations.  Sheesh!

Grilled Cheese Cheese Stuffed Cheeseburger

Two Slices of Bread

Two Slices American Cheese

One Slice Swiss Cheese

One Half Pound of Lean Hamburger

Butter

Sliced Tomatoes

3 Slices Crisp Bacon

Divide the hamburger into two patties.  Fold the Swiss cheese into a square and pressinto the center of one of the patties. Top with the second patty and press to seal edges. 

Grill or fry hamburger, until done.

In the meantime butter two slices of bread, and lay on fryingpan, add cheese to the slices of bread and grill till cheese melts and crispybrown on the other side.

Lay cooked hamburger on one of the bread and cheese slices.  

Top with tomato slices and bacon. 

Serve your amazing creation.

Cheating is often more efficient

I admit it . . . I cheat sometimes. When I’m cooking, that is. For the most part, I try really hard to cook with whole, unprocessed ingredients. But sometimes I run short of time or I’m just plain lazy . . . ya, it happens occasionally. So what do I do when I don’t overly feel like cooking and don’t necessarily feel like getting take-out? I use a cheater recipe. “What’s that?”, you ask . . . it’s a way to end up with a delicious home cooked meal without spending lots of time to get there. I’ll look around the pantry, in the freeze and the fridge to figure out what I’ve got that I can throw together into something quick and yummy.




This is one of those. This dish goes together quick and tastes phenomenal . . . good for any meal, any time and it’s great left over, too! Yum!


Cheesy Meaty Potato Pie

• 1 20 Oz Packageshredded Hash Browns (Thawed)
• 1/3 Cup Butter, Melted
• 1 Tsp Chicken Bouillon
• 1/2 Lb Bacon
• 1 Lb. Ground Pork Sausage
• 1/3 Cup Chopped Onion
• 1 Cup Cottage Cheese
• 3 Eggs, Slightly Beaten
• 1/2 Cup Shredded Swiss
• 1/2 Cup Cubed Cheddar
• 3 Eggs

In a large bowl, combine hash browns, butter and bouillon.

Press into the bottom and up the sides of a greased 10″ pie plate. Bake at 350 for 25 – 30 minutes or until edges are lightly browned.

Meanwhile, in large skillet, cook sausage. bacon and onion over medium heat until meat is no longer pink and the bacon is crispy; drain.  In the skillet, combine the cooked sausage mixture, cheeses, and eggs.

Pour into hash brown crust.

Bake at 350 for 40 – 45 minutes or until a knife inserted near the center comes out clean.

Let stand 5 minutes before cutting.

Well, I'll be damned!

There’s all kinds of weirdness in Connecticut.  By American standards, there are some very old places here.  With old places come legends, superstitions and hauntings.   I’ve lived in and near many of these places.  One prevalent tale is of the Melungeon . . . or Melon Heads are they are more commonly referred to.   The term “Melungeon” has been bastardized into “Melon Head.”

These people have cut themselves off from the mainstream and the result of which is a micro-society of inbred, giant-headed mutants.  These communities live unseen on the outskirts of towns.

One theory is that the Melungeon are a group of isolationists thought to inhabit the more out-of-the-way areas of the eastern sections of the United States . . . from the Appalachian Mountains all the way up into New England.  They are believed to be the mixed-race descendents of colonial European outcasts, freed slaves and Native Americans.

There are multiple Melon Head legends in Connecticut . . . Monroe, Seymour, Weston, Oxford, Southbury, Trumbull and Shelton.  It is believed that our indigenous big-noggin’d freaks could possibly be the descendents of escaped mental patients.  The institution that housed them burned to the ground in 1960.  Most staffers and inmates perished in the fire but several patients were unaccounted for and have yet to be found.  

The inmates hid in the forest and nearly starved to death.  Instead of returning to the world that had shunned them they resorted to cannibalism to survive the harsh winter.  

Although they mainly forage in the woods and streams for sustenance, it is said that their taste for sweet human flesh has not waned . . .  that they live quietly and independently in the backwoods of Connecticut but are not adverse to snatching up an unwary hiker or camper.

As described by those who have seen them firsthand say that “they are small in stature, frail looking, with long spindly arms and fingers. Their teeth are crooked, blocky, and discolored. Their most conspicuous feature, their heads, are bald and bulbous and out of proportion with their stooped torsos. Some observers say their eyes are red.”

I’ve travelled many of the more famouser roadways that the Melonheads have been spotted on or near . . . Zion Hill Road in Milford, Sawmill Road in Shelton and Velvet Street in Trumbull . . . and I’ve never seen or encountered any stubby people with bulbous heads.  That’s not to say they’re not out there.  I did once come across a mailbox that may have been telling of the inhabitants contained within the attached residence.

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Inspired by Countertop Chronicles Pork Reuben


1 pound Extra Thick sliced bacon 
Thousand Islands Dressing
Can of Sliced Artichoke Hearts
Swiss Cheese
Can of Sauerkraut


Melt butter in a large skillet.  Place two slices of bread into the hot butter and top with swiss cheese.

Cover to help cheese melt faster.

Heat up the sauerkraut. Once its and hot, drain it and mix it to taste with Thousand Islands salad dressing.

Grill up bacon to desired taste . . . nice and crispy!

Layer the bacon on the grilled cheese bread.

Layer the artichoke hearts on top of the bacon.

Put a layer of the tasty and warm Thousand Islands Sauerkraut on top of the artichoke hearts.

Top with the other slice of grilled  cheese bread.

See if you can manage to eat it without making a mess  . . . a tasty, tasty mess!